Kids Kids Kids...

Last night, my brother and I drove to Allentown, PA for a Drum Corps International (DCI) show. We try to go every year that it’s running, and this was the first live show since 2019. Last time we went, I vividly recall pumping in the car before the show started and at intermission. It was nice to be free of that damn pump 3 years later!

Now I have a 3 and 5 year old and things are getting *slightly* easier. Justin (my husband) and I started having a conversation yesterday about whether we’re really done having kids or not. We both assumed that we were…like vasectomy-level assumed…but I guess I just wanted to really confirm before I physically can’t have kids anymore. The window is closing soon, so I just wanted one last discussion about it. We both love the idea of a larger family later in life, but the thought of extending the amount of time we have with young, very dependent children is a hard pill to swallow. Not only that, but as I get up there in age (I’ve hit the 40 mark) it seems like the risk of something going wrong is ramping up too.

The logical part of me says “Count your blessings – you have 2 healthy kids are it’s actually getting easier” while emotional me says “Cute baby!! A big family around the Thanksgiving table! One more human to get to know and love unconditionally!” In the end, logical me usually wins out. However, this is a huge decision that deserves some real consideration. Justin and I agreed to each take a week to really think about it and reconvene. I'll get back to you when we decide.

Okay, this wasn’t much about instant gratification today but just had to share those thoughts with you. This feels like a really safe space to open up. Thank you for that! In terms of my decision about Facebook, I’ve given myself the green light to check it in the mornings for a few minutes, just to stay connected to people, but the app is staying off my phone and I’m going to resist checking that or Instagram throughout the day to deal with moments of downtime or lack of stimulation. That feels like a good compromise. On a high note, I didn’t check Us Magazine this morning! Win!